Understanding Self-Destructive Behaviour

Self-destructive behaviour refers to actions, patterns, or habits that cause harm to yourself—whether physically, emotionally, socially, or in terms of your life goals and circumstances. These behaviours exist on a spectrum and can include things like self-sabotaging relationships, engaging in risky activities, neglecting self-care, substance misuse, or patterns of negative self-talk. Often, these behaviours develop as coping mechanisms during difficult times and may have once served a protective purpose, even if they no longer do. It is important to approach these patterns with compassion rather than judgment, recognizing that they often signal underlying pain or unmet needs.

Therapy can offer a supportive environment to explore and understand the underlying factors that contribute to self-destructive behaviour. A therapist may help you identify triggers, examine past experiences that shaped these patterns, and develop awareness of your emotional responses. Together, you can work on building healthier coping strategies, strengthening self-compassion, and gradually replacing harmful patterns with ones that better serve your wellbeing. Various therapeutic approaches—including cognitive-behavioural therapy, dialectical behaviour therapy, and trauma-informed therapies—may be helpful depending on your individual situation and needs.

Anyone who recognizes patterns in their life that consistently work against their own interests or wellbeing may benefit from exploring support options. This might include individuals who find themselves repeatedly sabotaging relationships, struggling with harmful habits they want to change, engaging in risky behaviours, or experiencing persistent negative self-talk. You do not need to be in crisis to seek help—therapy can be valuable at any stage, whether you are just beginning to notice concerning patterns or have been struggling for some time. Reaching out for support is a sign of self-awareness and courage.

Finding the right support starts with understanding that many therapists who work with related concerns—such as anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional regulation, and stress—can often help address self-destructive patterns as well. When searching for a therapist, consider looking at those who offer approaches like cognitive-behavioural therapy or dialectical behaviour therapy. You can browse therapist profiles on First Session to find a therapist in Canada, watch their intro videos to get a sense of their approach, and see if their style feels like a good fit. Being honest about availability in your specific area, you may also want to explore online therapy options to expand your choices.

Several therapeutic approaches may be helpful when working through self-destructive patterns. Cognitive-behavioural therapy focuses on understanding the connection between thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. Dialectical behaviour therapy emphasizes emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal skills. Trauma-informed therapy can be valuable if past experiences contribute to current patterns. You might also explore therapists who work with anxiety, depression, stress management, or self-esteem concerns. Many people find that addressing underlying emotional challenges naturally helps reduce self-destructive behaviours. Consider learning how therapy works to better understand what to expect from the process.

First Session connects you with a growing network of therapists across Canada who have had their credentials verified during onboarding. You can browse therapist profiles, watch intro videos to get a sense of each therapist's personality and approach, and book appointments online. While our network of therapists who specialize specifically in self-destructive behaviour is still developing, you can explore professionals who work with related areas such as anxiety, depression, trauma, and emotional wellness. You can filter by location, whether you prefer online or in-person sessions, and other factors that matter to you. Learn more about how much therapy costs and signs of a good therapist to help guide your search.